I recently came into posession once more of all my school reports. Reading back through them for the first time in over 10 years, I was struck by the consistency of my school work and my reports. All the way through, from 1st year to Upper 6th, the mantra was repeated - "must try harder".

There was another theme throughout. That of my 'oral' abilities, which translates as 'he's a noisy sod'

So here, for the first time, complete and unabridged are my high school reports, colour coded to reflect these themes. Only my real name has been changed to protect the innocent. The teachers names are all real, as I felt that they should be credited for their perception!